This is my husband Terry dancing up the sidewalk to retrieve our newly delivered beach chairs after returning home from work. We finally have steady warm weather here in Green Bay, Wisconsin. Photo is a still image courtesy of our Ring Video Doorbell.
I’ve enjoyed helping my husband Terry find more balance in his life. He has always worked hard, and now he knows how to rest hard too. Most men need some encouragement to take care of themselves in healthy ways. They need genuine love, affection, and appreciation that allows them to be vulnerable and self-loving.
People talk about abolishing “toxic masculinity”, but that won’t happen until men are allowed and encouraged to show their sadness, fear, and fragility as we women do daily. There’s a reason men don’t seek help with their mental and physical health – they are socialized from a young age to just toughen up and figure it out alone. And that is a recipe for disaster.
A Prayer on My Birthday
Dear God, Thank You so much for guiding, supporting, protecting, and loving me for another year. I couldn’t do Life without You.
Thank You so much for my wonderful husband Terry, who sang to me moments after waking, and my dear 88 year old mother Ulla, who called and sang me a Swedish birthday song. My heart is so full.
In the midst of my blessings, God, I think about all those suffering in the world right now. I pray that You give strength, support, and healing to all those in need. AMEN.
💜 My Daily Bible Reading: Psalms 23:1-6 💜
“The Lord is my shepherd; I have all that I need.”
“He lets me rest in green meadows; he leads me beside peaceful streams.”
“He renews my strength. He guides me along right paths, bringing honor to his name.”
“Even when I walk through the darkest valley, I will not be afraid, for you are close beside me. Your rod and your staff protect and comfort me.”
“You prepare a feast for me in the presence of my enemies. You honor me by anointing my head with oil. My cup overflows with blessings.”
“Surely your goodness and unfailing love will pursue me all the days of my life, and I will live in the house of the Lord forever.” AMEN.
Laughter is the Best Medicine
Whenever I’m having a difficult day, he goes out of his way to be silly and make me feel better.
I captured one of these moments last fall. On this particular day, I was feeling very scared about an upcoming doctor’s appointment. He threw on his silly hat, dropped to the ground to play with my feet, and started singing the Rocky Theme Song.
And it worked. I felt instantly better.
Humor is so important in a marriage. You never know what life is going to throw at you, and being able to laugh together, even during the serious moments, is a beautiful thing.
Just Be You
Trying to be what you think people want, need, expect, or like is EXHAUSTING.
Pay attention to those people that accept you for you.
They are PRICELESS.
Highlights for me, the Thinker…
Deep thoughts, big questions ✅
Intellectual curiosity ✅
Ability to find & create meaning ✅
Ideal collaborator, the Adventurer ✅
Inquisitive mind ✅
Sense of wonder ✅
Depth of perception ✅
“Seek out the company of the Adventurer types, who provide the perfect counterbalance to your introspective and analytical nature. The infectious energy and playful spirit of the Adventurer remind you to embrace the joys of creation, and to not be afraid to get your hands a little dirty in the process.” ✅
Young at Heart
This is 55. When you stay young at heart, it shows. My husband has true love, peace, and happiness in his life, and for a man, that is everything. He loves his job, and his health has never been better. Most importantly, he knows how to play and not take life too seriously. I turn 55 myself next month, and try to follow his example as much as possible.
I Knew Something Was Wrong
I’ve had a love for swimming since I was 4 years old. I learned how to swim in a pool in Pompano Beach, FL during one of our annual Florida family vacations. I later enjoyed using this pool at Forest Hills Country Club in Rockford, IL where my parents have been members since 1980. I was on the FHCC swim team and basically lived there during the summers in middle school, high school, and college. (Photo courtesy of Forest Hills Country Club)
Fast forward 20+ years to July 2016, and I am using the pool at the Princeton Gym in Madison, WI. I was just starting to get back to swimming laps, and I noticed that my left arm felt heavy and numb. I told my husband that something was wrong, and that was the beginning of a very scary time for us. My MS diagnosis came on August 26, 2016.
It is common for people that receive a life-altering diagnosis to go through a grieving process. It takes time to accept your new “normal” and to heal from the medical trauma that you endured. I am very thankful that I’ve had the resources, support, and education I need to adapt to my life with Multiple Sclerosis. I realize that not everyone has that, and I don’t take it for granted.
Joy in the Little Things
I just received this GIF from my husband. Amazing how a small image of two adorable bunnies eating greens can brighten my morning. This is the good life – when simple brings pleasure.
Holidays are Bittersweet
Many of us struggle with loss during the holidays, especially now during the pandemic. This is notably true when it’s a parent that has passed on. This is my husband and his mother, Ann Clark, who died on Thanksgiving Day in 2017. My own father, Edward Kercher, died in 2011, a few days before Father’s Day. It doesn’t get any easier as the years pass, as much as you wish it did.
My husband Terry Clark just had his best sales year ever. He absolutely loves his job which draws on his natural talents and abilities. At 55 years old, he has definitely hit his stride. We are forever grateful to God for giving him this work opportunity 7 years ago, which brought him to Madison, WI where I was living at the time. We moved to Green Bay, WI 4 years ago so that he could help build an office and service area here.
I can’t lie. When the temperature in Green Bay, Wisconsin drops to -6° F (-21° F with wind chill), I miss the gorgeous San Diego weather. I lived there 8 years for graduate school and a postdoctoral residency. In those days, socks, coats, hats, and umbrellas were of no use to me.
My husband just left for work and said to me, “Stay in and stay warm.” Yeah, that won’t be a problem. I already have the fireplace going.
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