This is my husband Terry dancing up the sidewalk to retrieve our newly delivered beach chairs after returning home from work. We finally have steady warm weather here in Green Bay, Wisconsin. Photo is a still image courtesy of our Ring Video Doorbell.
I’ve enjoyed helping my husband Terry find more balance in his life. He has always worked hard, and now he knows how to rest hard too. Most men need some encouragement to take care of themselves in healthy ways. They need genuine love, affection, and appreciation that allows them to be vulnerable and self-loving.
People talk about abolishing “toxic masculinity”, but that won’t happen until men are allowed and encouraged to show their sadness, fear, and fragility as we women do daily. There’s a reason men don’t seek help with their mental and physical health – they are socialized from a young age to just toughen up and figure it out alone. And that is a recipe for disaster.
Whenever I’m having a difficult day, he goes out of his way to be silly and make me feel better.
I captured one of these moments last fall. On this particular day, I was feeling very scared about an upcoming doctor’s appointment. He threw on his silly hat, dropped to the ground to play with my feet, and started singing the Rocky Theme Song.
And it worked. I felt instantly better.
Humor is so important in a marriage. You never know what life is going to throw at you, and being able to laugh together, even during the serious moments, is a beautiful thing.
Highlights for me, the Thinker…
Deep thoughts, big questions ✅
Intellectual curiosity ✅
Ability to find & create meaning ✅
Ideal collaborator, the Adventurer ✅
Inquisitive mind ✅
Sense of wonder ✅
Depth of perception ✅
“Seek out the company of the Adventurer types, who provide the perfect counterbalance to your introspective and analytical nature. The infectious energy and playful spirit of the Adventurer remind you to embrace the joys of creation, and to not be afraid to get your hands a little dirty in the process.” ✅
This is 55. When you stay young at heart, it shows. My husband has true love, peace, and happiness in his life, and for a man, that is everything. He loves his job, and his health has never been better. Most importantly, he knows how to play and not take life too seriously. I turn 55 myself next month, and try to follow his example as much as possible.
Play comes easy when we are children. But when we become adults, play must be a conscious choice – and an important one.
Adulthood brings responsibilities and stresses that we never imagined in our younger days. For a lot of us, that means a complete disconnect from all the things that brought us joy in our youth.
But making play a part of our adult life is essential for our overall well-being. We must reconnect with those activities that brought us pleasure back in the day.
For my husband, that is playing disc golf. I love this photo of him teeing off because this is his fun zone. He earned the name Captain Comet from his buddies – the man has skills.
Note: Gotta love the ‘Beware of Alligators’ sign in the lake. It certainly adds to the adventure of the game.